Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
