Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
