What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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