it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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