WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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