hotel room ftw
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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