i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
