She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize