she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
