Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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