This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
