$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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