I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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