I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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