i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
organizing the empties. That sober.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
