oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm at about main and main street
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
