honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
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