I heard we made out
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I need water and some morals
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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