Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
