Don't you send me to vm
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
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I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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