Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
