Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
