How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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