Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
