I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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