Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
