Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
