There is no way he is gay with that hair.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
