My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pinky promised me she was 18
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize