Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize