Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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