im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
