I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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