So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Randomize
