just tell him i said nine months
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
you win again, gameday.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
