I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
You've changed since you got that strap on
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
