I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize