Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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