Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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