You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
