porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
