yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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