Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
