I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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