i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
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