Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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