ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
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