Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
50% drunk capacity currently
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
