My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
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