what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
