She went from zero to smokin in five shots
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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