maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
