Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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